Ramblings on identity, pain, faith...

What does it sound like? What does it sound like to say 'I am tired of hearing another tragic Palestinian story'? Like the same story repeating itself over and over… but told from different mouths, with a few differing details here and there… but in the end it’s still the same story.

Am I tired because it hurts? Because the mere listening after a while becomes just as painful as being there… can you shut yourself off from the narratives even when you feel you’ve had enough?

I want to absorb it all and I want to block it all out. I did, I do, want to hear it all… but is it becoming harder to do so?

Why did I come here? To find myself, to identify with a certain group… only to end up feeling removed, a world apart? And what if there are others who feel this way? And yet, what if that very confusion was the point of it all?

Is it contradicting that I have, and will continue to, identify at times with either one side or the other, but sometimes with both at the same time?

But who was it who initially said what, or who, I have ‘to choose’? Is that not the example to follow from Him; to seek and accept truth no matter where it comes from because it will come anytime from anyone, anywhere?

As human beings, do we not have multiple identities and loyalties to which we cling to…? but in the end, how much do they really matter?

Does your faith come first, second, last?

Was not the point of Jesus to enlighten us to our humanity as opposed to nationalities, ethnicities, religions, etc…?

An irony… That sometimes finding yourself can actually feel like losing yourself in some ways...
Or simply that some aspects start to take precedence over others.

For me there is only one component that will ever make the real difference in the way you experience pain and endure harsh times in life. I know my answer to that. +